No doubt you've heard about the fender bender at the corner of Elm and Second Street. Oh, sure you did. Tom was out in his brand new convertible traveling west. Jane was just coming back from a client meeting; she was going north in her SUV. The two cars came across the intersection at the same time and crashed. There were bits of car strewn all over the road. Six people witnessed the accident. Fortunately no one was hurt.
When the police arrived, Jane and Tom were standing in the middle of the street (blocking traffic in all four directions) arguing and pointing fingers at each other. Angry motorists were shaking their fists. The two officers separated the drivers and each took three bystanders aside to begin the interview process. And what do you think? When they went to compare notes, they found they had eight versions of the accident. How can that be? A chain of events can happen one, and only one, way. The answer, in a word, is perspective.
We'll leave the police to solve that problem and make out their report. We like the story because it sets up the next reason for writing your memoir. This article is part of an ongoing series, and I hope you'll find the inspiration and encouragement you need to try your hand at memoir writing. My co-author of the collective memoir Rosie's Daughters: The "First Woman To" Generation Tells Its Story, Matilda Butler, and I believe that any writer (experienced or novice) who delves into this most versatile genre can find a satisfying niche or a reason for writing that makes sense to her or him.
Back to the reason for this article...to dissect the reason we call "write to tell your side." Have you ever listened to someone tell a story and wanted to correct them? Tell them how they have the story wrong?
Perhaps your older brother loves to tell what a brat you were. But you know that it was the only way you could get heard over the explosive din caused by four older brothers. Maybe your husband tells guests about the wonderful family camping trip, while all you remember is singeing your eyebrows on the propane stove, running out of toilet paper and the night a bear stole the trout you were planning to have for breakfast.
Your sister may describe your life as one filled with lemons. You, on the other hand, may take pride in the way you took those lemons and turned them into lemonade. You're filled with stories of how you made the most of what you had--lessons that could give encouragement to others facing trying times.
Imagine your life as a written story. Then imagine putting the pages through a paper shredder and jamming them into a wastebasket. Others, even those who know you well, could try to put the pages back together. However, just like poor old Humpty Dumpty, they can't. Only you know how your life story fits together. By writing your memoir, you get to tell your side of the story. You get to say how the pieces fit together. After all, only you know how life's experiences affected you. Your siblings, your parents, your friends might tell the same story, might try to tape the strips of life back into the right order, but the resulting story is guaranteed to come out differently. Now there's nothing wrong with different perspectives. Different views. Just as with the traffic accident, everyone thinks they are telling the same story. But point of view is unique. And it deserves to be heard.
Just because you've never written before is no reason not to begin with your personal memories. Go ahead, set the record straight...as you see it. Having your say may be reason enough to satisfy you, but you may also be contributing an important piece to your family's record.
Okay, here's a little Bonus Writing Prompt to help get you started: Begin small with an event that has a clear beginning and end. Close your eyes and recall a holiday or special event. Write it first from your perspective. Then try to write it from the point of view of your sibling or your mother. Compare the two stories, and you begin to understand what your unique perspective brings to the story.
not bad
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